My Dearest Friend,
I want to start by saying that my “story” is really just starting or maybe it is just getting good. I can confidently say I am proud of myself. I have made it through some brutal times when the light at the end of the tunnel seemed more like the train coming.
August 2015 will make 10 years that my father Jose Cecilio passed away. It is probably the single most impactful moment in my life thus far. He was an amazing man and a beautiful soul. He enjoyed music and dancing. His spirit was HUGE!
My father demanded the best for me. When I was 3 months old he made a decision to remove me from my birth mothers home. Even today the details as to “why?” are fuzzy but it all worked out. He literally handed me over to his sister Juanita Rivera. She has been such a model parent an absolute warrior.
My father got sick rather suddenly. I received a call stating that he had fallen ill after a heart procedure. At the time I was really not doing well. My son was 2 and I was in a relationship that I was not happy in. I needed support. During this difficult time it seemed everyone had decided they would depend on me. Within a weeks time I was asked to make a decision to pull my father off life support. I was torn and confused. I look to my son’s father for guidance and a shoulder to lean on. I needed his input. At the time he was on a business trip. I had asked him to come home but he declined.
Fate dictated and one of my co-workers decided she would come to the hospital with me. Her name was Zania. She was unconventionally beautiful and for the most part we were strangers. I had worked with Zania a handful of times and if I am completely honest I was strangely attracted to her. Prior to my father falling ill I had never given the attraction much thought.
I indeed made the decision to pull my father off life support. Within minutes he had passed away. My mother, the strongest women I know sobbed at the news.
Losing a parent is difficult and knowing that I had made the decision to pull him off of life support left me feeling rather lost. There was so much guilt left behind in addition to anger. However loss tends to also put things in perspective rather quickly. It was in the weeks that followed my father’s death that I decided that I would live in authentic life.
Authenticity requires change and for me those changes were radical. I left my son’s father. He did not support me when I needed him the most. I moved out and moved in with my mother with nothing but a bag of clothes. I left everything behind. I started to focus on my health and wellness. I worked harder than I ever had at to reach my career goals. I prayed, meditated, and spent hours analyzing my feelings. During this time I also decided that I would no longer date men.
This came as a shock to my family especially my mother. I was raised with strong Christian values and coming out compromised my relationship with my loved ones.
I am most proud of the fact that I was able to come out without hesitation or reservation. I deemed my happiness worth any risk. Some how, in my 24 year-old soul, I knew who I was, who I am, and whom I decided to love was MY choice. I had faith that my family would accept me. I had faith that if I could just find my happy everything would fall into place.
Zania spent hours talking to me on the phone. She would travel long distances just to hang out for a few hours. She would play non-stop with my son Ethan. Zania put effort into us. Before I knew it I had fallen in love with her. We became partners in the most amazing partnership.
June 7, 2015 I married my soul mate Zania. My family was there to witness and help celebrate our special day. My mom was over joyed to see me walk down the isle, wear a beautiful dress perfect for the occasion. My son walked me down the isle.
Today, I have what I had 10 years ago. The difference is I earned it. Starting from scratch humbled me but it also gave me reassurance that I was far stronger than what I thought. Today I’m focused on being the best servant leader. You’ll find me day dreaming about having another child and finding my passion.
My dearest friend…be relentless. Never compromise who you are. Be fearless, give yourself pep talks, and take it one day at a time. Oh, remember it is okay for you to have everything.
Jeorgina Cecilio
My hope is that women realize that it is okay to start over. Be free to re-invent yourself. Be an artist…create a masterpiece.
We want to share more with you! Click below.
Sending love, luck & calm vibes.